September 2006

People are always posting the songs that would make up the soundtrack of their life, but I’ve never really been able to pinpoint songs that really fit me. Then today I thought of “Keep Looking” by Sara Evans and was struck with the realization that the song fit my life perfectly. Here’s and excerpt:

“Back when I was young
Couldn’t wait to grow up
Get away and get out on my own
And looking back now
Ain’t it funny how
I’ve been trying to get back home, yeah

When my low self esteem
Needs a man loving me
And I find me a perfect catch
Then I see my friends
Having wild weekends
Then I don’t wanna get quite so attached
Just as soon as I get what I want
I get unsatisfied

Good is good but could be better

I keep looking, I keep looking for
I keep looking for something more
I always wonder what’s on the other side
Of the number two door
I keep looking
Looking for something more…”

Does anyone else ever feel like they’re always looking for the next best thing? I’m really beginning to worry that there’s something wrong with me.


I just got my car back. The repairs ended up only costing $639 because I cried. Not to say that this is the best method, but I was frustrated and exhausted so when they could only approve me for $500 credit toward the repairs the tears just came. The girl at the counter felt sorry for me and gave me a discount, then when the repair guy came in and talked to me I just got more upset. I guess he felt bad for me too because he gave me another 10 percent off.

It was a relief because it meant I had the $139 I needed to pay for it, except now I can’t pay my student loan this month, but that’s just Uncle Sam. He’s pretty forgiving, right?

Anyway, the real reason I was writing today is because while I was waiting for my car to get fixed I was unpacking some boxes and I found a letter I wrote to myself when I joined sorority (we had to do it). It was dated Oct. 4, 2004, but it could have been written by me today. I guess not so much has really changed. Here’s an excerpt:

“As always work is frustrating because I feel like no matter how much I work I still have no money and I feel like work gets in the way of me doing well in school and me doing things that I really want to do. Why oh why can’t I be independently wealthy or win the lottery?!? Maybe someday somebody really rich will feel sorry for me and give me a ton of money…”

Oh and my favorite is the last line of the letter to myself:

“I hope Bush gets voted out of office.”

Too bad that didn’t happen.

Kay, well I’m feeling better now that my car is at least running. Hope you are all doing well.

I’ve come to the conclusion that the only reason I was so depressed/frustrated last week was because I don’t have ESP and had no idea this week was going to be even worse.

It’s 1:11 a.m. and I just got home from shooting for napkin nights. Only I didn’t shoot any photos because I forgot my I.D. at home and was on my way back to get it when I blew out the clutch on my POS car.

Oh, and did I mention my car overheated this morning and I just got it back from the shop at 5 this afternoon? I didn’t? Well, this day has come full circle. My car has now been towed to the Ford dealership where I will have to promise my right arm in exchange for the repairs needed. Why did I opt to commute? If I lived in Lodi I could live without this *&%^ing car.

On the bright side, at least I got one photo tonight:

They say bad things come in threes right? I hope the third one doesn’t cost me any more money.

Update: It should only cost about $1,000 to get fixed, I have $90 in the bank. Awesome

If you haven’t noticed, I have a new button on my front page. It’s a link to my stumbles at You can add this feature from firefox and whenever you find yourself bored (and have already checked your myspace fifteen times today) you can just click the stumble button and it will take you to a random website. From there, you can give it a thumbs up or thumbs down AND you can review it. I’ve been having a lot of fun with it and thought I’d fill you all in on the greatness that is stumbleupon.

I bid you go forth and stumble.

I can’t believe it’s really been 10 days since my last blog post. I feel as though I’ve neglected my duties as a myspace blogger. But I’ll offer an explanation…

I’ve been working my regular job. On top of that I’ve been working a few nights a week taking photos for napkinnights at clubs and bars here in Sacramento. And now I’ve added a third prospect to the mix. This weekend I trained to become an apprentice at PEAK Adventures, where hopefully I’ll learn to guide hiking and rockclimbing trips. It leaves me little extra time (or energy) but it breaks up my week enough that I don’t want to kill myself from boredom of a regular routine.

Add to this the fact that I’ve been moving and trying to unpack as many boxes as I can with little closet storage and no furniture to put anything in and you’ve got a very stressed out Rebecca. But things should calm down here in a few weeks and I’ll feel back to my old self.

In the meantime, I miss all of you. I’ll have to plan a group gathering soon.

Actually, no. I don’t think these shoes look particularly comfortable, but thought they were funny so I’m sharing them with you.

Check out the website.

First, sorry about my childish outburst earlier this morning. I had to get it out of my system or I wouldn’t have been able to concentrate at work. With that said, I hope at least some of you are still listening because I actually did have something important to say today.

A few days ago I posted a African safari website that promotes the hunting of endangered species and I was completely and utterly appalled, as anyone should be.

But I couldn’t just leave it at posting this appalling thing and wondering forever why this guy isn’t arrested for helping people kill endangered species. So I emailed him and politely (this is key to getting an unhateful response) asked what the laws were and how this was possible.

Here is the response I received:

“Elephants are endangered in some countries and can not be hunted.

Zimbabwe, South Africa, Namibia, Tanzania, Mozambique, Zambia and some other countries have a surplus of elephants and allow CONTROLLED sport hunting.  The hunting and movement of elephant parts is controlled by and internatinal organization known as CITES (Convention of International Treaties of Endangered Species)which over 100 countries belong to.  In some countries there is a large excess of elephant.  Zimbabwe has over 70,000 elephants, 30,000 more than they should have for the size of land they occupy. All monies made from hunting is given to countries National Parks office which in return uses to management their animal resources.”
Now, some of you may not be convinced by this response, but I did check out CITES and they are very much like our own Department of Fish and Game. They allow some hunting of these animals in areas where they are over-abundant, as Donald explained quite well in his comment on my last blog.

I may not be so willing to believe this if I hadn’t seen and heard about something very similar when I was in Costa Rica. When we were visiting La Fortuna, CR, we visited a restaurant where sea turtle eggs are on the menu. Naturally, we were appalled because we’d just spent the past two weeks working to save the sea turtles.

However, these particular sea turtle eggs are allowed to be taken from the beaches by the government. They are eggs from the Olive Ridley Sea Turtle, which nests on the pacific coast of Costa Rica. While the species is still considered endangered, there are more than 10,000 (if I remember correctly) female turtles nesting on a small strip of beach at the same exact time. This creates a huge problem because the females end up digging up the nests of other turtles, squashing the eggs and leaving a mark for predators to find the newly-laid nest. Not only that, but it creates a huge health risk because the eggs spoil and wash off into the ocean and also create a really horrible stench.

Therefore, LOCALS are allowed to take as many eggs as they can within the first 45 minutes of nesting each night.

NOW, I’m not saying I agree with the killing of cheetahs and elephants. I’m just offering you the explanation. I’m still disgusted by this, but thought I’d get the conversation started. What are some other solutions to this problem?

PS I also don’t think Africa’s politicians have the right priorities when it comes to endangered species anyway. In Costa Rica it was very obvious that the people are well-aware of the benefit they have as one of the last places on earth with an abundance of untouched wildlife and they spend a great deal of time and attention on preserving it. The CITES website itself seemed to think African politics were disrupting what is best for these endangered species. A better solution may be to teach these countries that their natural resources can make them just as much money by being conserved as they can by being exploited.

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